Boyfriend hell. A Nobel prize to the person who eliminates the need for dating. I can’t figure guys out. Last night’s stud called back this morning to confirm his interest—I wonder if he’ll break down his reserve after a few weeks… What’s wrong with having sex on the first date? Instead, he wants dinner one night, a movie the next—should I speed the process by providing the lure of a dinner? Or should I go on a moratorium? I know I must go home and clean house in any case…
Why must everything be so contrived? I don’t think we should see Godfather III either… Oh who knows?
I should go home and CLEAN HOUSE.
Tomorrow I deal with the travel agent—another BLIND DATE FROM HELL:
“Please explain things I already know.”
“Whose superego is strongest?”
“I’m not really interested in sex until I’ve established a strong platonic rapport.”
(He’s too good-looking.) Any brains?
So I won’t have time for swimming today. Life is too full.
“Let’s be very careful about what we say.”
“Better yet, let’s not give a shit and give the fellow a good taste of reality.”
I must conspire with Ed for a birthday surprise for Michael…
Dating really shoves priorities up into one’s face…!
Put up your dukes
Looking for fit dad to give
tough love to boyish 31 y.o.
I’m firm 5’11 190 lb healthy
HIV+ and seeking dominant man
who likes a challenge with
prospective of a stable
[Journal entry, 9 March 1991]